Real Africa, and the pictures of lions to prove it

Of course by 'real' Africa I mean the ethnocentric stereotypical conception of the 'wild and untamed dark continent' that popular culture has raised us on. Having said that, visiting Kruger National Park was an incredibly authentic experience. While many Africans live in cities and have probably never seen a lion or an elephant, the natural world is obviously a big part of what comes to mind when one thinks about 'Africa'.

Venturing out from Pretoria for a second round, this time with my partner in crime Lesley by my side, we and another couple from Malta made our way toward Kruger to go on safari. The first day was spent half travelling and half exploring the Blyde River Canyon, the 3rd largest canyon in the world after the Grand in Arizona and Fish River in Namibia (which I will be visiting next month). Our first stop in Blyde was 'God's Window' - a fitting name for the view; we were overlooking a vast, lush plain. Too bad it was so hazy that day. From there we made our way to the 'potholes', an area with a river running over rocks that had the effect of carving out the rocks to form hundreds of formations that look like potholes. Truly beautiful, I think this was still Lesley's favourite. Our final sightseeing trip for the day was to the 3 rondavels (another word for a round mud hut with a thatched roof). These seemingly impossible formations are of 3 gigantic rocks that have been eroded over millions of years to look like 3 rondavels. I know, it's mind blowing how often things are named after things they look like. To end the day, our driver dropped us at a tribal village to learn about how the Shangaan people 'used' to live. Les and I found this experience a little tacky and unauthentic, something like a pioneer village in Canada, but I thought it was still a good experience. We were taken around the village and told about how things would function, were shown how they make maize meal, straw mats, etc. At night we had a traditional meal of maize meal or 'pap', pumpkin, chicken, cabbage and essentially the same stuff I had in Lesotho and have been having all over the country. After dark the boys that lived there did a traditional Zulu dance which was actually really damn cool I thought. We slept in a traditional rondavel like the one in Lesotho with a door made of some sticks lashed together.
Early next morning we were dropped at a camp just inside the Orpen gate of Kruger National Park (which by the way is the size of Israel and completely untamed) and picked our tent. Soon after we got into an open sided truck and went hunting for animals. Our guide told us it was one of the best days she has ever had in her decades of experience. Within the first 5 minutes we had seen a pack of cheetahs, impalas (a kind of deer) and an elephant. Throughout the day and over the next we ran into some Kudu (type of moose), hippos, over 2 dozen giraffe, a variety of birds including vultures, eagles and banana beak birds, a hyena nursing it's cub on the side of the road, turtles, wildebeest, zebras, a herd of elephants, warthogs, cape buffalo, baboons, and a family of about 10 ostrich. The final day we went on a night drive, as some animals are nocturnal. We managed to see a pack of hyenas hunting and finally I got to see my Rhino even if it was for a few seconds and I couldn't get a picture! Interesting to note is that the animals were almost completely unfazed by our presence. Apparently they cannot see a vehicle as anything but an unrecognizable but non-threatening animal until humans stick their appendages out the window.

The night drive had the unfortunate side effect of strengthening my dislike of tourists. I could not believe how childish people were acting - making way too much noise and pushing and shoving each other. This one particular gentleman had me laughing out loud because of how excited he got to see a bush baby (type of tree creature - not really sure how to describe it. The guy wouldn't stop going on about how "Oh my God it just ran from that branch to that branch, that's magical! Look, now he's over there... quick, everybody come look!" As usual, the pictures speak for themselves.

After Kruger we were dropped in the cultural abyss of Nelspruit. Unable to get transportation to Swaziland on the same day, we were forced to relax for a day which I spent far too drunk in the pool of our hostel (I have the pictures of myself hugging a giant octopus to prove it.)

The next day we rented a car with the intention to drive into Swazi with the Maltese couple. I was nervous about driving on the left for the first time, and my experience with stick shift is limited and only compounded by the gear shift being used by the left hand, but I was determined to learn. The car arrived late but hey at least we're on our way now, right guys!?!?! God: "Haha no sorry Mike, not quite yet." As fate would have it, we got 15 mins outside of the city then "Bam-Bam. Hissssssss." Not one but TWO flat tires on the same side. I had hit a pot hole. 2 flat tires minus one spare tire equals... still one flat tire. Thank God the Maltese couple had a cell phone to call a tow truck. Our delusions of pressing on into Swazi were corrected after waiting 3 hours for the truck to arrive despite repeated assurances that it was 10 minutes away at hour 1 and 2. The driver was instructed not to bring us a spare tire, but to tow us back to the airport, about 20 mins drive PAST the hostel. On the upside, we got a much nicer replacement car and I got to ride in the bed of the tow truck with the wind in my hair and white knuckles. With night falling, the four of us headed back to the hostel for another night of drinks. The next day we set out for Swaziland. But that, is a story for another post...